Enclosure

Most of my missions were harrowing like
licking the edge of a cup until my tongue bled.
It was a Spring full of wonder and charged
with a sense of grief masked by May's
languid charm. I built window boxes
that sat bloated with color and bees
on a window ledge near the B.Q.E.
I fancied myself cultured and secure
but that changed when people more cultured and secure
than me made their presence known
in notes scrawled on foil and taped to the door
leading into my apartment. I was churning inside
from all the rutting and declined opening
any sort of nervous boon to their existence
or mine, which were trembling and delirious.
From time to time I pushed my face against the glass
until I felt my own pulse in my cheek.
I fancied gashes there and real bone that
added shape to my face protruding from the wound
but I also saw what was up with the vibe
of the creatures who made my life easier
with their non-spasms and steadfastness.
I am on my way to someplace vast and satisfying
but I feel so useless and redundant. Other than
providing information services, I also design buildings
that make people want to dance in them
or on them or in front of them. I would like
to dance with you for a few years and then
I would like to let go of you and just watch
you fade away like a pop song being turned
down on a car radio so you can whisper something
to me about going away and what it really means.
Hello, my name is Todd.